Tuesday, September 27, 2011

WTHIUWT Part 3 - Infomercials

WTHIUWT Part 3 brings us to one of the biggest issues with TV today; infomercials.  There is a local channel that many of you may have heard of, especially if you have younger kids.  The channel is Qubo, and it has many shows that my kids love to watch.  The one and only gripe I have about Qubo is that infomericals replace normal commericals from other channels.

Infomercials usually follow the pattern below:

- Show an idiot trying to do a simple thing in the worst possible way.

- Show them making a mess doing it the worst possible way.

- Introduce new and interesting product that helps said idiot do a simple task in a way that was never intended.

- Show idiots happy family as the product of the simple task is shown to them

- Offer - 4 of x items for $$$ along with the handy, dandy <thing>.  But wait, there's more.  If you act now, we'll double your order.  8 of x items and two handy, dandy <things> for $$$ plus $$$$

- Sorry, no C.O.D.'s

One I saw the other day was for people who have serious issues.  They mutilate pancakes without regard for the shape they end up in.  They put the pan on the oven upside down and then spread the batter directly onto the burner.  They then take a plastic spatula to the batter and it melts to the burner.

Next comes the lady who brings in the new contraption, which looks more like a mideival torture divice than a pancake mutilator.

It's great... and if you act now, I will throw in this handy, dandy socket wrench.

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