Spending Money

Have you noticed the amazing ability people have for spending money?  It's not just our own money either.  We are good at spending others money as well.

It was promised at the outset of this blog that it would never cross paths with politics.  So instead I am going to walk next to politics just close enough to spit on it.

There are some days when I wake up and think, "you know what, I want to buy a Ferrari today."  So I look around at Ferrari prices and realize that they are just a tad out of my price range, so I decide to get a soft drink instead.  Another time during that same day I think of how nice it would be to get my belly button pierced.  Then I think about the needle and how odd it would look in my inny belly button compounded by how bad it would hurt to get it done, and the crazy idea leaves me.

This illustrates two points.  One, people on a budget (see most people) have to make decisions based on what is available to them at the time.  Two, just because you get a crazy idea doesn't mean you have to do it.

Ok, so here is where I walk close to politics.  The way governement works is they make a budget for all the things that it takes for the government to function.  Roads, check.  Healthcare, check.  Oops, we just went 1 trillion dollars over... oh well.  Hey, wouldn't it be cool if we got new shower heads for all the showers in the whole nation so we could save 1 ounce of water every three showers at a cost of 500 billion dollars?  Yep, lets go to Home Depot.  Heck, while we are there, let's just buy Home Depot for 10 billion dollars because we can run it better...

Hey Politics... you've got a little spittle on your face...

Choices

We can only wonder why things happen when and how they do.  Maybe you are a believer in coincidence, which actually means you aren't really a believer in anything.  It could also be that you believe that fate rules your destiny.  When you think about it, this basically means that regardless the decisions you make, what happens was already predestined to happen.  Fate basically removes all need to even think for yourself.  The truth, it seems, is in the middle of these two philosophies.  Coincidence cannot be the governing force in our lives because it would preclude the possibility of consequences for our actions.  Fate too is equally untenable because fate cannot account for all probabilities as their are hundreds and in many times thousands of choices made each day.

We are the product of choices, big and small.  Making the decision to leave ten minutes early may allow me to miss the traffic jam, or it might put me right int he middle of it.  The amazing part of life is how the choices we make can turn into pivot points toward great things.  The only prerequisite to happiness is realizing that you always have a choice.  To paraphrase the English poet W.C. Henley, "We are the masters of our fate.  We are the masters of our souls."  Good words to live by.

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all you moms out there.  Seeing that none of us would be here without you, it's only fitting that you get a day all your own.  Here's to you and everything you are and stand for.  If I had my way, we would do away with Mother's Day.  Why give anyone the excuse to treat mothers with any less love and caring?  Why not serve, love, protect, and otherwise care for your moms all year?

Let's start right here and right now!  Mother's Day is every day!

Happy Mother's day, month, year, decade, and lifetime!  You deserve it!

Certainty

"I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second time into things that I am the most certain of the first time."

Josh Billings - 19th Century Humorist

Take a moment and look at the picture above?  What do you see?  Trees, nasty water, and grass?  Nice place for a picnic or a peaceful boat ride, right?  Now, look a little closer at the middle of the picture just off to the left.  See it?  The crocodile that nobody sees at first is simply lying in wait for someone or something to come along that was not patient enough to be certain.  Imagine if you had taken one passing glance to determine the safety of this location instead of taking a second or third look to be sure.

How many times have we walked down a dark hallway or into a dark room and our brain is certain that it is safe to walk through there?  We don't turn on the light because we are so firm in our certainty that it would just be a waste of charged particles to flip the switch.  We take one step without issue and then throw caution to the wind and start walking faster.  Step three or four is when we impale our foot on the Lightning McQueen car.

The decisions to look before you leap and to judge the book by what's between the covers are character traits that to a certain extent we all lack experience with.  It is only by doing these things that one can be certain of anything.  Certainty implies effort on our part.  One can never be sure of anything unless they have the patience to view something from all angles and the character to accept when someone shows them an angle they didn't initially think about.

It is interesting that I can't find a good way to end this post... one thing is for certain that this isn't it...

Wise Guy - My Take on the News

Einstein-

First of all, we here at the Wise Guy Blog are not well versed on the names of any major scientific theories, and we certainly don't presume to have any scientific knowledge on anything of any value to most people.  We do have a theory on who let the dogs out and something we like to call the "poop principle", but that is hardly an academic achievement.

Einstein on the other hand, knew his theories.  For example, his theory of relativity states (and here is where our lack of scientific knowledge is on display) that the mass of an object affects both the space and time around that object.  If we had our way we would rename this theory the Fat Guy That Sits Next To Me on the Plane, Squishing Me Into the Window, that Drones On and On About Star Trek and Smells Strongly of Frito's Theory.  If you want to see a practical explanation of Einsteins theory, this is it.  The space you are smashed into as well as how time will literally stand still is all the proof we need that Einstein was right.

You could also try to prove Einstein's theory the way the scientists did using a satellite with gyros in it, but that doesn't drive it home like the Fat Frito Guy on a Plane does.

Source: http://www.space.com/8279-einstein-rules-universe.html

Los Angeles Lakers -

There is trouble in the land of the misplaced team name.  Down 0-2 to the Dallas Mavericks, it doesn't look good for the Jack Nicholson's guys.  

What am I saying... things are looking great!  The sun is shining and the birds are chirping.  Music is playing and people are dancing.  Mavs and Bulls in the Finals anyone?

Did You Hear the One About Michael Jackson, Marlin Brando, and Elizabeth Taylor?

Okay, so this one is pretty funny.  Apparently Michael Jackson, Marlin Brando and Elizabeth Taylor went on a road trip to get away from New York on 9/11.  They rented a car in Jersey to ride cross country to California.  Marlin Brando had them stop at all the fast food restaurants on the way through... perhaps he made them an offer they couldn't refuse?

 

Just wanted to take a second and say...

"May the Forth be with you"

Busy, Busy, Busy

Okay, so not too busy, just a little busy.  You can cancel the APB and the missing persons report.  The Wise Guy is back...