Thursday, May 5, 2011

Wise Guy - My Take on the News


First of all, we here at the Wise Guy Blog are not well versed on the names of any major scientific theories, and we certainly don't presume to have any scientific knowledge on anything of any value to most people.  We do have a theory on who let the dogs out and something we like to call the "poop principle", but that is hardly an academic achievement.

Einstein on the other hand, knew his theories.  For example, his theory of relativity states (and here is where our lack of scientific knowledge is on display) that the mass of an object affects both the space and time around that object.  If we had our way we would rename this theory the Fat Guy That Sits Next To Me on the Plane, Squishing Me Into the Window, that Drones On and On About Star Trek and Smells Strongly of Frito's Theory.  If you want to see a practical explanation of Einsteins theory, this is it.  The space you are smashed into as well as how time will literally stand still is all the proof we need that Einstein was right.

You could also try to prove Einstein's theory the way the scientists did using a satellite with gyros in it, but that doesn't drive it home like the Fat Frito Guy on a Plane does.


Los Angeles Lakers -

There is trouble in the land of the misplaced team name.  Down 0-2 to the Dallas Mavericks, it doesn't look good for the Jack Nicholson's guys.  

What am I saying... things are looking great!  The sun is shining and the birds are chirping.  Music is playing and people are dancing.  Mavs and Bulls in the Finals anyone?

Did You Hear the One About Michael Jackson, Marlin Brando, and Elizabeth Taylor?

Okay, so this one is pretty funny.  Apparently Michael Jackson, Marlin Brando and Elizabeth Taylor went on a road trip to get away from New York on 9/11.  They rented a car in Jersey to ride cross country to California.  Marlin Brando had them stop at all the fast food restaurants on the way through... perhaps he made them an offer they couldn't refuse?


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